Текст песни Cosmik Debris, Frank Zappa

from the Frank Zappa LP "Apostrophe"


The mystery man came over
and he said "I m outta sight!"
he said for a nominal service charge,
I could reach nirvana tonight.
If I was ready, willing and able
to pay him his regular fee,
he would drop all the rest of
his pressing affairs and devote
his attention to me.

But I said "Look here brother-who you
jiving with that cosmik debris?
Who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Look here brother, don t waste your time on me."

THe mystery man got nervous
as he fidgeted around a bit,
he reached in the pocket of his mystery robe
and he whipped out a shaving kit.
Now I thought it was a razor
and a can of foaming goo,
But he told me right then when the top popped open,
there was nothin his box won t do,
with the oil of Aphrodite, and the dust of the Grand Wazoo.
He said "You might not believe this, little fella,
but it ll cure your asthma too."

But I said "Look here brother-who you
jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now what kind of a guru are you?
Look here brother, don t waste your time on me."

"I ve got troubles of my own", I said
"and you can t help me out,
so take your medications and your preparations
and ram it up your snout!"
"But I got the crystal ball", he said
and held it to the light,
So I snatched it all away from him,
and I showed him how to do it right.

I wrapped a newspaper round my head,
so I looked like I was deep,
I said some mumbo-jumbo,
then I told him he was going to sleep.
I robbed his rings and pocketwatch,
and everything else I found,
I had that sucker hypnotized,
he couldn t even make a sound.
I proceeded to tell him his future;
then, as long as he was hanging around
I said "The price of meat has just gone up,
and your old lady has just gone down!"

And I said "Look here brother-who you
jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now is that a real poncho or a Sears poncho?
Don t you know, you could make more money as a butcher?
Don t waste your time on me."